Uncertainty
by Phantasy Star
Summary: Darien's life changes dramatically when Serena moves into his apartment. How long can he avoid his feelings? [Finished]
1. Part 1: Coward

Uncertainty  
by Phantasy Star  
--------------------  
  
Part One: Coward  
  
  
PROLOGUE  
  
It was a dark, winter night.  
  
In one of the only quiet parts of downtown, a girl dressed surprisingly lightly   
in this cold weather walked quickly, eyes filled with worry. She was a stunningly   
pretty girl, but she didn't seem to revel in this fact at the moment. She stopped   
every few moments to frown or to sigh. Coming to an intersection, she waited, head   
down, for the bright coloured figure to replace the red hand.   
  
A moment later, she stepped off the curb and onto the street. Suddenly, a car came   
up with horrifying speed, stopping only a few inches from her, with a loud braking   
screech. She shut her eyes tightly in fear.  
  
A few seconds later - "Miss?"  
  
She turned slowly to look at the driver of the car that had nearly run her over.  
  
He was an attractive fellow, and she noticed an air around him that only movie stars   
seemed to have. That reserved, aristocratic look.   
  
"You all right?" the young man asked, leaning out of the driver's window.  
  
She took a deep breath.  
  
"Sorry about that," he said, "I was in a hurry. Shouldn't have tried running that   
red light."  
  
To the fellow's horror, the girl's eyes suddenly welled up with tears.  
  
"I just lost my job, I'm tired, I'm hungry," the girl said, "and now some crazy   
guy's trying to run me over!"  
  
The gentleman looked shock, then uncomfortable, "Well, like I said, I'm sorry.   
I didn't-"  
  
"I don't even have a place to stay the night," the girl said, sniffling, "Maybe   
it would have been better if you had run me over."   
  
By now, a crowd had gathered to watch what seemed like a couple in a fierce   
argument. The gentleman realized that he was still in the middle of the   
intersection, and cars were sounding their horns impatiently around him.  
  
With all of his dignity and movie-star air gone, the young man mumbled his   
apology one more time and fled, before the girl could make a bigger scene.   
The girl looked around nervously and then continued quickly down the crosswalk.   
Finally reaching her destination, she came to a coffee shop and went inside.  
  
  
  
PART ONE  
CHAPTER ONE  
  
I stepped on the brake pedal and slowly came to a halt before the red light.   
I could have made it, probably, but I wasn't going to take my chances anymore.  
  
Not after yesterday.   
  
You never know when crazy blondes jump on to the crosswalk without watching out   
for cars.  
  
I finally arrived at the charming little coffee shop my best friend owned   
downtown. My friend Andrew was the type of guy that everyone liked. His   
optimistic view on life seemed to brighten everyone's day somehow. Probably   
the reason people kept coming back to his shop. And the good coffee.   
  
"Hey, Darien, didn't see you come in. Here," he said, putting my coffee  
on the table, "Hope this hasn't gone cold. Made this fifteen minutes ago, where   
were you?"  
  
"Traffic," I answered.  
  
I gratefully put my hands around the cup and let it warm me up.   
  
"Hurry up," Andrew said, "I want to go home."  
  
I decided to take my time drinking.  
  
In the car, Andrew was strangely silent for a while, looking like he was in deep   
thought. Finally, when we were almost back to the place we rented, he spoke up,  
"Darien, you know how you've always said you're bored?"  
  
Not sure why he brought it up, I answered, "Yeah, sure. Nothing exciting really   
happens to us."   
  
"Hmm, I don't mean it that way. I mean, you know how you say our apartment is   
boring? We've been living in the same place for four years in a row!"  
  
"Uh-huh," I nodded.   
  
He didn't want to move, did he?  
  
By now, we had reached the parking lot of our apartment building.  
  
"Wouldn't it be fun if someone moved in with us for a change?"  
  
I stopped the car, "What?"  
  
"Okay, Darien, I really need a favour."  
  
I sighed, "What is it?"  
  
"You remember my little sister?"  
  
"Vaguely. The cosmetic specialist?" I said, chuckling.  
  
"Yeah, so you know her, right? Well, what happened was, she got fired from that   
department store on the other side of town where she was working."  
  
"And?"  
  
"She's out of money. She can't afford that townhouse she rents anymore."  
  
"Yeah, so what does that have to--"   
  
Then I figured it out, "No way, Andrew. Are you insane? Our apartment is small   
enough already!"   
  
"She's just a little girl! You won't even notice her, I'm serious."  
  
"There's no way I'm going to live with a girl."  
  
"You'll be paying less rent..."   
  
Hmm, tempting...   
  
But no.  
  
"I've done some pretty strange things for you, Andrew, but not this time."  
  
He crossed his arms, looking upset.  
  
"Well, then, you explain it to her," he said suddenly, "You tell her to sleep in   
the streets. You tell her she has to move all her things back out."  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
  
  
CHAPTER TWO  
  
Over the six years we've known each other, Andrew has done some pretty weird   
things to me. And vice versa, I guess. But somehow, we've always got past   
these petty differences and move on with our friendship.  
  
That was not happening today.  
  
"Tell her to move out? Does that mean that she's already moved in?"  
  
"She doesn't have a place to stay, Darien. Do you think I would let my own   
sister sleep on the streets? My own sister. My own poor sister!"  
  
He finished that last part dramatically.  
  
I was not amused.  
  
"It'll be only for a few days, Darien," Andrew said seriously, "I promise."  
  
I didn't say anything, and it seemed to scare him.  
  
I silently parked the car and got out.   
  
"Darien? Darien?"  
  
I was still quiet in the elevator.   
  
"Listen, man, I'm sorry. But it's really not that bad. Just a few days, top."  
  
I sighed, not knowing what to do.  
  
I looked at him, "Two days, and then she's out."  
  
He closed his eyes and clasped his hands together, "Yes sir."  
  
I opened our apartment door and froze in shock.   
  
Crazy girl alert.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER THREE  
  
"Darien, Serena. Serena, Darien."  
  
I extended my hand, and discovered that I was shaking. Two things intimidated me.   
One was broccoli, and the other was crazy girls.  
  
She was the girl I met on the street last night!   
  
Little girl, yeah right. She looked only a few years younger than we were.  
  
She looked at me questioningly, like she was looking at a suspect in a murder, "Do   
I know you?"  
  
I shook my head quickly, "No, you don't."  
  
"Hmm," she said slowly, then she gasped.  
  
"You're that freak who nearly run me over with your car!"  
  
I winced, "Oh, yeah, now I remember..."  
  
She looked at her big brother Andrew, and pointed at me accusingly, "The day I came   
to you for help, he nearly killed me on the street! Then he didn't even stop to ask   
me if I was okay, he just left!"  
  
"I did ask you if you were okay," I said defensively (this girl was completely irrational!),   
"I apologized, twice, at least-"  
  
She seemed to have already developed the habit of interrupting me, "I can't live here,   
Andrew! You said your roommate was really nice, but he, he..."  
  
Andrew silenced her, "Serena, I'm sure that it was only an accident. Darien's a nice   
person, really. You two will get along fine. Darien, maybe you should apologize to her."  
  
What? Apologize? Again?   
  
Maybe she should be saying sorry to me for making a spectacle out of the both of us!  
  
I shook my head, "Why should I apologize?"  
  
I regretted my words right after they left my mouth. Two pair of blue eyes turned   
immediately to glare at me with pure hatred.  
  
I gulped.  
  
"All right, I'm sorry, um, whatever your name was."  
  
Her features seemed to soften a little, and I saw, again, the pretty face that she   
hid so often with frowns and scowls.  
  
"It's Serena," she said, "It's okay. I mean, I guess we should start off on good terms.   
After all, I'll be living here until I find a job, and you're letting me stay here for   
free until I have a fixed income... So I should be grateful to you..."  
  
For free? But didn't Andrew say...  
  
He looked at me pleadingly, so I kept my mouth shut.  
  
And that was how I met Serena, and how life suddenly became more interesting.  
  
And scary.   
  
  
  
CHAPTER FOUR  
  
The next morning, I stepped on Andrew when I got out of bed.  
  
He had dragged his sleeping bag into my room so that Serena could have his old room   
all to herself.  
  
He mumbled something angrily, then went back to sleep. It was a Saturday, the only   
day in the week when I get to wake up at ten. If Serena was anything like Andrew, she   
wouldn't be up till noon. I decided it was the perfect time to get a little time alone.  
  
I opened my bedroom door to be greeted by smells of bacon and egg, and the sight of   
Serena rummaging through our kitchen drawers.  
  
"Good morning, Darien!" Serena said cheerfully, turning around, as if we were the best   
of friends, "I made breakfast! Isn't Andrew up yet?"  
  
I shook my head, still shocked at the sight of her in her bunny pyjamas and Garfield   
slippers. Then I noticed how I must have looked and escaped to the bathroom to get   
washed and dressed up.  
  
Oh, horror! My precious, clean bathroom has been invaded!   
  
The counter was lined with bottles, soaps, and unknown substances as far as the eye   
could see! Meanwhile, my old toiletry were no where to be found.  
  
"What happened to everything?" I cried frantically.  
  
She came in quickly, "Oh, I got everything replaced. No wonder your hair looks like   
wires! You've been using all the wrong shampoo."  
  
Then she picked up a bottle filled with lime-green liquid.  
  
"This," she said wisely, "This is the shampoo you should be using."  
  
I stared.   
  
"Where did you get all these?" I blurted out.  
  
"Got'em this morning. Thought I'd get up early and do you guys a favour."  
  
"No, I mean, how did you get these? I thought you were out of money."  
  
She laughed, as if I had asked a stupid question, "These are samples! Can't you tell   
how small the bottles are?"  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Well, I'm going to finish fixing breakfast. You go ahead and do your thing in here"  
  
I nodded dumbly. I think I was blushing.  
  
Serena was going to take some getting used to.  
  
***  
  
The next few weeks went by pretty quickly. Andrew and I got accustomed to having a   
new roommate.   
  
And I had to admit, my hair was a lot better with that new shampoo.  
  
It was about two weeks after her arrival that I found out Serena really wasn't that   
bad. She made all our meals, probably because of all the extra time she had,   
considering that she was jobless. Her cooking was pretty impressive, compared to   
our old diet of pure canned foods.   
  
After a month or so, I think it was safe to say we were semi-good friends. But   
somehow, we still bickered a lot. I had a constant urge to make fun of her all   
the time, probably because of her eccentric behaviour.  
  
One night, when I came home alone from a meeting on a bridge-building project, I   
found her standing in the middle of the room playing a violin. She didn't notice   
that I had come in, and I waited outside. It was beautiful music, really.   
  
The cynical side of me wondered how she afforded the violin, but decided to dismiss   
the thought.  
  
She seemed embarrassed when I asked her about her music, so I didn't bring it up again.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER FIVE  
  
"Anyway, I think we're all clear on the project? In that case, meeting adjourned."  
  
I groaned. It was just like my boss to make my job much more interesting.  
  
I worked as a computer software programmer. The job is usually not a very interesting   
one, that is, if you worked under anyone but my boss.  
  
Mr. Tin was looking for someone to become the new assistant supervisor (the last one   
had a bungee-jumping freak accident, apparently) and he decided that the best way to   
determine the best candidate was through a competition.  
  
By the end of June, everyone was to turn in a computer game, which wasn't my field   
anyway. The one to turn in the best game - in his opinion, that is - would get the   
promotion.  
  
Not having much knowledge about computer games, I had little chance.   
  
On the way home that night, I went to the closest Electronic Boutique and went to the   
games section. I decided that I would buy a few to get an idea of how computer games   
were like nowadays.  
  
My jaws dropped. The prices were insane! I could probably afford ten games maximum   
with all of my life savings.  
  
Leaving the store, I found the nearest counterfeit CDs store instead, and picked out   
several purchases. RPG's, strategy games, action games, whatever I could find.  
  
When I got out of the store, I looked around quickly to see if anyone I knew saw me   
doing something so morally wrong. Then I headed home.  
  
***  
  
"I didn't know you were interested in computer games," Serena said, "Aren't you a little   
old for them?"  
  
"No, it's for work," I muttered, trying to defeat the "demon boss" I was fighting in   
the game, "Want to help?"  
  
"Sure," she said happily, "How do you play?"   
  
I read out loud the instructions while she took over the keyboard. I stared wide-eyed   
while she got through the entire game with ease.   
  
"Hmm, I got 483230. Is that good?"   
  
That was ten times as much as I ever got!   
  
But I wasn't about to admit that a girl beat me.  
  
"It's okay," I replied, "Good for a beginner."  
  
It was true.  
  
"Now, I have to get to work," I said, "Go organize your make-up kits or something,   
will you?"   
  
She scowled, "For your information, I have lots of important things to do, better than   
to play computer games with an immature twenty-four-year-old."  
  
Then she stormed off into her room.  
  
And I grabbed the controls to try again, determined to beat her score.  
  
I frowned when the words "Game Over" flashed across the screen.   
  
  
  
CHAPTER SIX  
  
A month later, when I arrived at the coffee shop to pick Andrew up, he told me   
Serena wanted to meet us at a restaurant downtown, and that she had important news.  
  
We arrived at the restaurant to find a beaming Serena, all dressed up.  
  
"So, what's the big deal?" I asked, "Did you discover a new perfume or something?"  
  
She glowered at me, then whispered excitedly, "I got a job!"  
  
It was hard not to be happy for her, when she was so happy herself.  
  
"That's great, sis!" Andrew exclaimed, "I'm so proud of you."  
  
"So what is it?" I asked, "McDonald's?"  
  
She hit my arm, hard.   
  
"It's not really a job," she admitted, "My old violin teacher called me a few days   
ago. He said he was doing some tours in the United States and parts of Canada. And   
he wants me to go with him!"  
  
While she continued to talk excitedly about all the people she will have a chance   
to meet and all the places she'll get to see, I couldn't help but to wonder selfishly   
how long the trips were going to be. Who was going to clean and cook in the apartment?   
And keep me company while I was working at home...?  
  
"So, how long will you be gone every time?" Andrew asked. (Andrew and I are   
telepathically linked.)  
  
"About a month... But... even after I come back, I don't think I'll be living with you   
guys anymore. Remember how I said I would leave once I get a job?"  
  
Finally! My own room again!  
  
"Took you long enough," I said jokingly.  
  
She scowled, "You're a jerk, Darien, but thanks anyway for letting me stay for   
the last few months. It's been fun."  
  
I grinned. 


	2. Part 2: Up and Down

Uncertainty  
by Phantasy Star  
---------------------  
  
Part Two: Up and Down  
  
  
CHAPTER SEVEN  
  
I scratched the back of my head in frustration.   
  
I was stumped for ideas on my project.   
  
On top of that, the apartment was a mess, and Andrew and I were back to eating   
canned foods breakfast, lunch, and dinner.   
  
We got a letter a few days ago from Serena, but it was very brief. She said that   
she was having a wonderful time and couldn't wait to see us again.  
  
Well, she said she couldn't wait to see Andrew again.  
  
Because the letter was actually addressed to him.  
  
But she did mention something about saying "Hi" to Darien.  
  
Anyway, I had decided to make my project an RPG, or a role-playing game, which was   
basically a game with a story. I had managed to work out the characters and a   
good but unoriginal plot. But somehow, it wasn't the same as other games.  
  
What was missing?  
  
"It's... flat," Andrew said when I had asked him, "There's... There's no   
emotions behind the game..."  
  
"Emotions?" I echoed. What did programming a game have to do with emotions?  
  
"Well," Andrew said, "Playing an RPG is like reading a book. The player should   
feel for the characters in the game... become the characters, even. And it just   
doesn't seem to work with your game."  
  
"It's a game for kids, Andrew," I said, "But I'll think about what you said.   
I've got nothing to lose."  
  
Over the next few days, I tried to put my some drama into the game. Throw   
in a couple of deeper thoughts here and there. But it all seemed pretty lame.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER EIGHT  
  
A few weeks later, Andrew came to me with the news that he was going on vacation.  
He said that he needed to get out for a while.  
  
About a week later, he was off to Hawaii (where else do people go on vacation?),   
and the number of roommates I had was reduced to zero.  
  
I came home late one night. Mechanically sitting down in front of the computer,   
I sighed. It was nice to have the whole place to myself, but I suddenly realized   
something disturbing: The only people I've been interacting with for the past week   
were the stupid characters in my game.   
  
The phone rang.  
  
"Hi Darien!"  
  
I mentally ran down a list of people I knew who had an annoyingly high voice.  
  
"Mina?"  
  
"That's right," my sister said laughing, "How's my favourite little brother?"  
  
I had met Mina at the orphanage where I had grown up, and we've called each other  
brother and sister for as long as I can remember.  
  
"'Been better," I said honestly.  
  
I don't think she heard me, "Listen, Darien, honey, I need a little favour from   
you."  
  
I groaned. Seemed like a lot of people have been needing "little favours" from   
me lately.  
  
"I need to go to Shanghai for, like, a couple of days, to help out a girlfriend   
of mine. And Jordan is still in Tokyo on business. So there's, like, no one to   
take care of Jordan Junior."  
  
Jordan was my brother-in-law and Jordan Junior was my three-year-old nephew.  
  
"So take him to your parents. You said they always love to have him there."  
  
"They're in Macau right now..."  
  
Here's where the favour came in, I realized.  
  
"You're asking me to take care of a baby?"  
  
"Um, yeah, basically."  
  
"What do I know about two-year-olds?" I protested.  
  
"I'll give you instructions, obviously," she said, as if I had said something   
stupid, "It's so easy and so much fun! Please?"   
  
I had a thought that maybe Jordan could keep me company for a while. I was   
that desperate for any kind of human interaction.  
  
"I don't know..." I said, still uncertain, "Are you sure there's no one else?"  
  
"I'm sure, why do you think I called you?"  
  
That was a nice thing to say.  
  
"All right," I said, "Just for a day or two, right?"  
  
"Right, I'll drop him off tomorrow."  
  
  
  
CHAPTER NINE  
  
"Bah."  
  
I looked at Jordan. He had both of his arms outstretched, waiting for me to pick   
him up.  
  
I took him out of the crib that my sister had provided me, and played with him for  
a while. I heaved him up, then brought him back down. And up, and down, and up,  
and down. Soon, he was laughing hysterically. I think I was laughing too.  
  
(I read in a magazine a few days later that swinging a baby around like that can   
actually damage his head, and one third of these babies suffer from brain problems  
later on in life... Good thing Mina wasn't here to see me lower her son's IQ.)  
  
Maybe looking after Jordan won't be so bad after all.   
  
My sister was right, he was very well-behaved. I had no problem with him during our   
first half-hour alone. And he was only here for the weekend and Monday, so I   
wouldn't have to take more than a day off.  
  
I put the excited baby back into the crib, putting an old teddy bear into his arms.   
I needed to get to work, I told him.  
  
He looked at me with wide eyes, blinking as if confused.  
  
I sat down in front of the computer and began to type.  
  
A few minutes later - "Waaaaaaaaahhhh!"  
  
I went quickly to his crib.  
  
"What's wrong, big guy?" I asked him.  
  
He didn't answer.  
  
"Are you hungry?"  
  
I handed him a biscuit, but he pushed it away, still crying.   
  
"Are you sleepy?"  
  
I picked him up and rocked him back and forth for a while in my arms, but he   
didn't stop his bawling.  
  
"Oh no, are you sick?"  
  
What if he had a fever? Has he caught the flu going around? What was I going   
to do? Should I take him to the doctor?  
  
Jordan was looking really distressed.  
  
Better safe than sorry.  
  
I grabbed my green jacket and began throwing some clothes on Jordan.  
  
Suddenly, someone knocked on the door.  
  
Mina!  
  
I flew to the door. I opened it to find not my sister, but Serena standing on the   
other side, looking the same as she did when she left, but even more stylish.  
  
A dream? I pinched myself.  
  
"Surprise!" she said.   
  
"What are you doing here?" I stuttered, after my ears stopped ringing.  
  
She put on a pouting look, "Yeah, well, I missed you too. I just got back from the   
tour, in case you've forgotten."  
  
"So, where's Andrew?" she asked cheerfully, having recovered from her brief moment of  
fury.  
  
"Not here."   
  
Then she peered over my side, "Um, I don't remember a baby living here."  
  
I stepped aside to let her see the still-crying two-year-old behind me, "My   
nephew, Jordan."  
  
"Oh, he's so cute!" she said in the way that all girls do.  
  
Then she walked over to the blubbering baby, now crying and hiccuping at the same  
time, "What's wrong, Jordan?"   
  
"I don't know," I answered for him, "I think he's coming down with something.   
I'm taking him to the doctor's. Want to come?"  
  
For some reason, I really wanted her to say yes. I have to admit I was scared   
about handling the situation myself.  
  
"Oh, he needs to be changed." She said casually.  
  
What?  
  
"Changed?" I asked.  
  
"Yeah, Darien. Babies don't go to the bathroom to do their business. They kind   
of, well, they do it right where they are."  
  
Oh.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER TEN  
  
In a few minutes, Jordan (or Jordie, a nickname Serena made up for him) had quieted   
down, and was sleeping peacefully in his crib. I went into the kitchen and got  
out two mugs of hot chocolate for her and me.  
  
"So, where are you living now?" I asked her, joining her on the couch.  
  
"I haven't really found a place yet," she admitted, "So I figured I'd live here for   
another couple of months, but... Now that Andrew's not here, it's only going to be me   
and you, and that's... that's..."  
  
She trailed off, so I finished for her, "Awkward."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
The word "awkward" seemed to take effect immediately, and we sat silently for a   
minute.  
  
Then I realized that I wanted her to stay for a while longer, because that I was getting   
tired of living alone, probably.  
  
"Well," I started, "There _is_ a baby here. What can happen?"  
  
She looked thoughtful.  
  
"Yeah," she nodded, "Not like it's only you and me."  
  
"And, you know, that's not even something we'd consider. I mean, we're not exactly   
good friends to start with."  
  
"Yeah, we hate each other. You're a conceited, self-centered jerk."  
  
"Yeah, and you're a clumsy ditz."   
  
For the first time, she didn't react to my insult. Instead, she picked up Jordan who  
had just woken up to stare at us in bewilderment, as if he was listening to our   
conversation.  
  
"You're going to need me here, aren't you Jordie?" Serena said, holding him up,   
"I wouldn't trust you with your dim-witted uncle here."  
  
"Hey, I can take care of him fine," I protested, "But I'll let you stay."  
  
"So it's settled then?" she said with a smile, "I'm going to unpack."  
  
***  
  
Jordan was actually quiet for the rest of the evening.  
  
But later that night, when Serena was out buying groceries (I had nothing in the  
fridge but half a can of pop) and I was finishing up work - "Waaaaaaaaahhhh!!"  
  
I began to think.  
  
Maybe... Maybe if I covered up the box with a blanket, he'll think it's   
nighttime and stop crying. That was how you put a bird to sleep, by covering   
its cage with a towel.   
  
I found a blanket and put it over the crib. To my amazement, Jordan was quiet   
for a minute. I quickly sat down and continued working.   
  
As I had predicted, I didn't need Serena, I could handle Jordan all by myself.  
  
A half hour later, when my eyes were starting to hurt staring at the computer,   
I heard a sound.   
  
A small cough.  
  
I sat up, fully awake now.  
  
Uh-oh.  
  
I ran to the crib and threw off the blanket.   
  
Jordan had his eyes shut.  
  
Was he always this pale?  
  
First thought: Is he okay?   
  
Second thought: Oh my goodness, is he dead? Have I suffocated my only nephew?  
  
"Waaaaaaaaahhhh!!"  
  
He was okay.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER ELEVEN  
  
"I'm going out to buy grocceries" was what she said that Saturday night. Yeah   
right. She returned with big colourful bags of baby clothes and toys.  
  
To my amazement, Jordan cooperated with Serena while she tried seven sets of  
outfits on him.   
  
I used the time to get some work done.  
  
"The light blue one," she said, "That one is definitely the best."  
  
I nodded, paying more attention to the monitor than to her.   
  
A moment later -- "Nope, I was wrong" she announced, "This one matches him   
even better. It's perfect!"  
  
"Great," I said, not even bothering to look enthusiastic.  
  
"C'mon, Darien, take a look!"  
  
I turned around and looked, then found my mouth hanging open in horror.   
  
Serena had dressed my nephew dressed in pink and yellow clothes with bunnies all over!  
  
"That's a girl's outfit!" I cried, alarmed.  
  
I immediately went to rescue poor Jordan, who looked more like Jodice or something now.  
  
"No it's not!" she protested, "It's unisex!"  
  
"Pink and yellow are _not_ unisex," I told her as I unzipped the zipper on the little  
pink shirt.  
  
"A lot of women find men in pink attractive."  
  
"Probably a lot more _men_ find men in pink attractive."  
  
She was berated.  
  
"You know what?" she said, "Forget it. I'm not about to argue clothing with a   
person with no fashion sense what-so-ever."  
  
After several other incidents like that, I was starting to regret letting her   
help me with Jordan. When I criticized her babysitting abilities, she would give  
me long lectures as to how she was trying her best and that I wouldn't be able to  
do better if the paid me. Or something like that.  
  
I wondered how I could have ever missed her.  
  
Wait, I never did, did I?  
  
***  
  
That night, while Serena was in the bathroom, I fixed Jordan a bottle and watched  
him take it. Somehow I envied him. Everything was simple. He cried when  
he was hungry, sleepy, or needed to be changed. No worries beyond that.  
  
But there are a lot of good things in life he was missing too, I guess. Like the  
feeling of accomplishment. Friendship. Love.   
  
Along with a lot of doubt and worry.   
  
I began to wonder why I was feeling a tugging inside of me. I was confused, almost.   
As if there was something bothering me, but I couldn't even grasp what the problem was.  
  
I sighed.   
  
"Bah," Jordan said softly, looking at me with those big eyes of his.  
  
"Don't worry, Jordan," I told him, "I'm fine. Just thinking, that's all."  
  
He turned his head a little, still not completely reassured, but went back to his   
milk. When he was done, I burped him and put him to bed.  
  
***  
  
The coming Monday, Mina came by as promised and picked Jordan up. While I was   
glad to be single with no children again, I was going to miss the little guy.  
  
But not as much as Serena, who shared a tearful goodbye with Jordie.  
  
"Are you sure you don't want me to pay you back for all the clothes you bought   
him?" Mina asked.  
  
Serena shook her head, still looking sad, "It's okay. They're my gifts   
to Jordie."  
  
"Well, thank you," Mina said, looking wistfully at us two babysitters,   
"So you know my brother pretty well, huh?"  
  
"Oh no, I'm just here for Jordie. Darien doesn't know what to do with him."  
  
"That's not true," I said, "She needed a place to stay 'cuz she's sort of   
homeless right now."  
  
She glared at me.  
  
If she wasn't holding a baby, she would probably have punched me then and there.  
  
"Well, you be good now," she told Jordan, handing him over to my sister.  
  
"Listen to your mum," I added, "and don't get into any trouble."  
  
"Bah," Jordan said in response.  
  
We watched Mina as she and Jordan drove out of the building.   
  
"Cute kid," Serena said softly, with a faint smile on her lips.  
  
I nodded.  
  
I don't remember how long we just stood there, but soon, Serena was walking back  
into the building and I was following closely behind her.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER TWELVE  
  
I was worried that Serena would move out now that Jordan was gone, but she didn't  
mention it, so I didn't either.  
  
During the day, she spent most of the time in her room, practicing. Sometimes when  
I came home at night, I could hear beautiful violin music through her door.  
  
Now that Andrew was gone, I decided to let her be my official game tester.   
  
To my surprise, she said the same thing Andrew did, but was more specific.   
  
"See, this part," she said, "where the hero meets the girl, we need a bit more  
drama there. There is obviously some chemistry between the two."  
  
"It's a kid's game," I told her, "Not a romance novel."  
  
"Well, it's never too early for a little romance..." she said thoughtfully.  
  
I groaned.   
  
She played my game for a while longer, and I was excited to see she was somewhat  
into it.   
  
"Don't look over my shoulder," she said, "I get nervous."  
  
I went into my room.  
  
***  
  
A few days later, I brought my game to my colleague Steve's house. He was a   
professional game designer, so I thought he would be able to help. The first  
thing he noticed about the RPG was that there was no sound.   
  
"I'll work on that later," I had said.  
  
"You should do it as you go through," he advised, "Music is just as important a   
component as the plot. An RPG without sound is like an ice-cream cone without  
the ice-cream."  
  
Right...  
  
I faked an agreeing nod and hid a growing smile. Poor Steve has obviously spent  
too much time in front of the monitor.  
  
That night, I went home tired and frustrated. The project was taking up more of  
my time than I had intended it to.  
  
"How's the game going?" Serena asked when I came into the apartment.  
  
"Still working on it," I said, "I need some music. Because, apparently, a game  
without sound is like an ice-cream cone without ice-cream."  
  
She decided not to comment on that, "Sure, Darien... But you know, all ice-cream  
aside, I might be able to help you with that music thing..." 


	3. Part 3: Fall

Uncertainty  
by Phantasy Star  
--------------------  
  
Part Three: Fall  
  
  
CHAPTER THIRTEEN  
  
It was amazing how fast time went. Before I knew it, fall had rolled in, and the  
leaves were changing colour. It had almost been a year since Serena had invited  
herself into the apartment.  
  
Over the past week, Serena helped me work on the music in my game.  
  
At first, I had thought she would help me _find_ music, but she had something else  
in mind. She said she wanted to compose the music herself, and that she already had  
some tunes worked out, just needed a place to use them.  
  
I insisted on paying her, but she said she'd do it for me, as a payment for all the   
months she's stayed in the apartment for free.  
  
Of course, the rent for all the months I've let her stay here is no where near  
the few hundred dollars I needed to hire a musician.  
  
"So when does the whole thing have to be done?"  
  
"End of October," I said automatically.  
  
She paused.  
  
"Isn't that a week from now?"  
  
"No," I said, "That's..."  
  
I glanced at the calender at the fridge.  
  
Then I froze.  
  
And I stared.  
  
And I gasped in horror.  
  
Was today really October 21st?  
  
Andrew leaving and Jordan coming and Serena coming back had made me completely lose track  
of time! I had less than ten days to finish a half-done project that decides whether  
I get a big raise or stay at this minimum wage income for the next few years!  
  
"Are you okay, Darien?" Serena asked, "You look pale."  
  
I turned to look at her.  
  
"I'm fine," I said shakily, "But we need to get to work."  
  
  
  
CHAPTER FOURTEEN  
  
"Okay," I said, "What should we start with?"  
  
"The main theme, obviously," she said, "So, the whole point of the story is..."  
  
"About a hero," I said, "Saving the world, killing bad guys, while protecting a girl."  
  
"Hmm," she said, "I have just the right thing. I've been working on a piece, called   
'For the Princess'."  
  
"Let's hear it."  
  
To my surprise, she looked down at the floor, "You really have to?"  
  
When I finally understood what she meant, I sighed.  
  
"Okay, look, Serena," I said as if I was talking to a child, "If I'm going to use your   
music in the game, I'm going to need to _hear_ it before I put it in."  
  
"Okay, okay," she said, "You don't have to be mean."  
  
I crossed my arms as she went into her room to get her violin.  
  
"Anytime you're ready," I said, having lost the little faith I had in her.  
  
She nodded, and began.  
  
It really wasn't that bad.  
  
I watched her, mesmorized, as she moved the bow over the strings gracefully, her eyes   
closed as if in a trance.  
  
The music was beautiful.   
  
Soon, I found myself enchanted by the sad, almost depressing melody.  
  
When she was done, I didn't know what to say.  
  
She looked at me worriedly, "Well? I've really worked hard on this. If you're not   
going to say anything nice, don't say anything at all."  
  
For some reason, no words came to mind.  
  
"It wasn't _that_ bad, was it?" she said uncertainly.  
  
"Wow," I said, letting out a deep breath, "That was... really good, actually."  
  
"Seriously?" she asked.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Thanks!" she squealed, beaming, then put her arms around me to give me a quick hug.  
  
I think my body went stiff, not knowing how to react.  
  
Fortunately, she didn't notice, "Okay, I'm going to my room to work on new material!"  
  
And she skipped happily off.   
  
And left me just standing there.  
  
I quickly shook the feeling off.  
  
I was discovering a whole new side to Serena, and I wasn't sure if I was ready for it   
or not.  
  
Hmm.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER FIFTEEN  
  
"Coffee?"  
  
I looked up, or woke up, rather, from where I was sleeping in front of the computer.  
  
"Please," I replied.  
  
Serena sat down beside me, her hair undone, wearing glasses instead of contacts, in   
pajamas and her usual Garfield slippers.  
  
Despite her lack of sleep and usual grooming, she somehow managed to stay looking   
great, one of the greatest mysterious in the universe. She always seemed presentable   
in her comfortable, charming kind of way.  
  
"Okay, we're done with that part," I said, my head throbbing.  
  
"Uh-huh," she mumbled, taking a sip from her cup, "Now we move on to part three."  
  
"Right," I said, "This is where the hero protects the girl from the evil guy who's   
trying to kill everyone."  
  
"Uh-huh," she said again, barely audible, "So, some cool battle music there."  
  
"Yeah," I said, "And then afterwards, a little bit of happy music, as a   
celebration."  
  
"Right," she said, resting her head on the table top, "Don't know if I can do happy   
music at the moment... How much time've we got?"  
  
"Five days, seventeen hours, and twenty two minutes," I said, groaning.  
  
"We'll make it," she said, taking her head off the table for a second to pat me on   
the back, then fell right back down.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER SIXTEEN  
  
"What the heck!?"  
  
I jumped, startled. Where was I?  
  
I glanced up quickly to see Andrew's horrified face, staring at me.  
  
Staring at me and Serena, beside me, still half-asleep with her head on the desk.  
  
"What are you guys doing!?"  
  
I stood up, "Nothing!"  
  
"I," Andrew began, "Wh- Th-... I... Wh- What the...?"  
  
"Serena's helping me with my computer thing and we were working overnight," I explained,  
"That's all."  
  
"I come back from my vacation and _this is what I find_? You all sleeping in the   
living room!?"  
  
I blinked. That didn't make sense.  
  
Serena finally got up, probably from all the yelling, and mumbled, "Oh, hi Andrew,"  
  
***  
  
After several minutes of explaining (my precious project time!), Andrew calmed down a   
little. Good thing Serena always has a way with talking to Andrew. Probably a brother-sister   
thing.  
  
"So, where are you living now?" Andrew asked her.  
  
Serena's eyes caught mine, and I looked at her nervously.  
  
"Um, Victoria..." she lied, "And, uh... twenty... second."  
  
"Oh, isn't that where Bering park is?" Andrew asked.  
  
"Sure," she said.  
  
"No wait, that's thirty second. What park are _you_ talking about?"  
  
"What park?" she asked.  
  
"You just said there was a park near where you lived."  
  
"No I didn't."  
  
"Yeah you did."  
  
"No... What...?"  
  
"But..." Andrew said, then decided to give up, "Never mind."  
  
Serena looked relieved.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN  
  
Serena and I had been working four days straight (I took the week off) on the project,   
and Andrew helped when he could, though he hasn't been home much lately.  
  
(Serena told Andrew that she wanted to move "back in" with us for a while because she was  
tight on money. Don't ask me how she explained why all her stuff was still in her room)  
  
I was beginning to get nervous. Could my game really be better than the ones the other   
four or five people working at my office designed?  
  
Somehow, though, even if I didn't get the promotion, I felt I still enjoyed the process of   
making the RPG. Who knows, I might try to sell it to a company later on.  
  
"You ever noticed how late Andrew has been coming home lately?" Serena asked me one day   
as we were working, "He closes the shop at eight, but comes home near midnight."  
  
"Yeah," I agreed, "Probably hanging out with friends."  
  
Serena nodded, still worried, "Probably..."  
  
"Okay, we're nearly done," I announced, "Just need the music for the ending."  
  
"Great. What happens in the end anyway? I've never played it up to there."  
  
"Well, the good guys win, of course. But in the process, the main characters get into   
an argument and they split up."  
  
Serena looked horrified, "They split up?"  
  
"Yeah," I said, hoping that she wouldn't start an argument about that.   
  
It was _my_ game after all. She probably understood that.  
  
No she didn't.  
  
"What do you mean they split up?" she complained, "What kind of an ending is that?"  
  
"A sad one," I said impatiently, "Look, I really don't have time to change it now,   
and, you know, that's life. Not everything ends up perfectly."  
  
She still looked displeased, but she got to work anyway.  
  
"I'm going to make a backup of the information we have already," I said, "Just in   
case we lose everything."  
  
"Mm-hmm," she said, working on the music composing program on the computer.  
  
"After we're all finished, I'm going to treat you to lunch or something," I said,   
trying to sound casual.  
  
She looked surprised, then went back to staring at the computer, "Sure."  
  
***  
  
Two days later, we were finally done. The game was finished, but I still needed to   
take care of some final details. Like getting a haircut.  
  
The night before my presentation, I went to the hairdresser's and Serena went out to buy   
me some slightly more decent clothing than the usual jeans and T-shirt I wore.  
  
"Good luck!" she said as I got into the car the next morning.  
  
I nodded and drove off to the office.  
  
***  
  
"Mr. Sheilds?"  
  
I stood up, confidently, with my game CD in hand.  
  
"My project is an RPG. It works under most operating systems, including Windows 95,   
98, and NT, as well as Macintosh. It uses a minimal amount of ram..."  
  
I continued to explain the programming behind the game.  
  
Then I popped the CD into the laptop, and the CD contents showed up on the overhead screen.  
  
And I saw the word "Backup" on the CD label.  
  
  
  
INTERLUDE  
  
I rolled my eyes as I put the CDs into the correct cases. Darien never put them back where   
they belonged after he'd used them.  
  
Then I came to the CD case marked backup. I opened it to find a CD without the word  
"backup" sprawled across. I quickly popped it into the CD drive and loaded it up.  
  
Oh no, this was the final copy of the game!  
  
I put the CD into the case and shoved it into my purse.   
  
Time to go!  
  
***  
  
I sped down the street.   
  
Turn right.   
  
Run the red light.  
  
Turn left.  
  
Cut in front of middle-aged man in a distasteful pair of suspenders.  
  
Pretend not to see pregnant lady trying to cross the street.   
  
Okay, time to step on the pedal and cut in front of that girl with an ugly sweater so I   
can make my right turn.  
  
To my surprise, the horribly dressed woman sped up and wouldn't let me get in front!  
  
I edged my car closer to her in a threatening manner, but Ms. Lack-of-fashion-sense   
wouldn't let get through.  
  
I gritted my teeth and slammed down on the gas pedal harder. I was going to get in   
front of her if it killed me!  
  
Ms. Lack-of-fashion-sense's eyes locked on to mine and gave me an intimidating glare.   
But I, Serena, would not be intimidated.  
  
Oh shoot, I'm going to have to turn at the next intersection. There was no way I could  
turn if I wasn't in the right lane. But I wasn't going to slow down and admit defeat   
either.  
  
Ms. Lack-of-fashion-sense, having noticed my right-turn signal, gave me an evil smile as   
if to say "Can't turn right, huh? Too bad!"  
  
I began to see red.  
  
Then I noticed that she was turning right as well.  
  
I think it was the adrenaline rush, maybe I wasn't thinking clearly.  
  
But either way, when both cars reached the intersection, and, even though I wasn't at the   
rightmost lane, I turned anyway.   
  
Yes! I did it!  
  
I cut into the second lane from the sidewalk, and I was right beside Ms. Lack-of-fashion-sense  
again.  
  
She glanced at me in shock, and I smiled back triumphantly.  
  
Then I stepped on the gas pedal.  
  
And round two began.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN  
  
"So it's not completed?" Mr. Tin asked me.  
  
"Oh no, it is finished," I answered nervously, "It's just that I brought the backup CD instead."  
  
And I faked a laugh. As if it was funny.  
  
And it _was_ funny, in a sick, twisted kind of way.  
  
Suddenly, Serena burst into the room. It seemed that she forgot to open the door,   
because she crashed into something (It was too fast to tell what it was) and landed   
on the floor, keeping one hand up holding the CD.  
  
"Here it is!" she gasped.  
  
I opened my mouth but no words came to mind.  
  
"Hurry up!" she said.  
  
I nodded and took the CD from her, while a colleague of mine helped her up, giving  
her a polite smile and holding her hand long after she said she was fine.  
  
I replaced the CD and began the presentation.  
  
After an hour of explaining my project, I sat down with a sigh. It was over. I had   
given it my best shot.  
  
And after another few agonizing hours of watching the presentations of the other   
projects, Mr. Tin told us he had made up his mind.  
  
***  
  
"You did it!"  
  
Serena grabbed my hand and jumped up and down, excitedly, "You got the promotion!"  
  
"I know!" I said, grinning, "Thanks to you."  
  
I think it was the first time I've seen her blush, "Well..."  
  
"C'mon, let's go for lunch," I said, "My treat."  
  
***  
  
After our little celebration that afternoon, things seemed to change between Serena  
and me. I started to ask her out to lunch every once in a while, and she usually said  
yes.   
  
We got closer and closer in the few days, and I began to feel differently around her.  
  
And I was happy about it.  
  
Then one night, when we went home at eleven, I made a decision.  
  
Andrew was out, the situation was perfect.  
  
"Long day..." Serena said as she and I walked into the apartment.   
  
"Yeah," I agreed, hanging my green jacket in the closet.  
  
"Wonder where Andrew is..." Serena said worriedly.  
  
"Mm-hmm," I replied, not really paying attention.  
  
I sat down on the couch.  
  
"Well, I'm going to bed," Serena announced, "It's getting late."  
  
She walked to her room, but I stopped her.  
  
"Wait," I called out.  
  
She turned around, "What is it?"  
  
There was a pause. I hesitated.  
  
"Serena, I..." 


	4. Part 4: Uncertainty

"Long day..."  
  
Serena and I walked into the apartment.   
  
"Yeah," I agreed, hanging my green jacket in the closet.  
  
"Wonder where Andrew is..." Serena said worriedly.  
  
"Mm-hmm," I replied, not really paying attention.  
  
I sat down on the couch.  
  
"Well, I'm going to bed," Serena announced, "It's getting late."  
  
She walked to her room, but I stopped her.  
  
"Wait," I called out.  
  
She turned around, "What is it?"  
  
There was a pause. I hesitated.  
  
"Serena, I..."  
  
  
Uncertainty  
by Phantasy Star  
--------------------  
Part Four (Final) - Uncertainty  
CHAPTER NINETEEN  
  
"Serena, I..."  
  
She turned to face me with an uncertain look on her face, and waited.  
  
I took a deep breath.  
  
"Serena, we've been hanging together a lot lately."  
  
I paused, looking for the right words.  
  
"And I've begun to think about some things."  
  
Serena sat down on the other end of the couch slowly, and I wasn't sure if she had  
figure out what I was saying or not.   
  
But there was no going back now that I had started.  
  
"And..." I said softly, "I think I've really begun to..."  
  
The phone rang.  
  
I sighed in exasperation and picked it up.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Is Darien or Serena there?" the lady on the other side of the phone said.  
  
"Yes, this is Darien."  
  
"I have some bad news. Andrew was in a car accident tonight."  
  
  
  
CHAPTER TWENTY  
  
"Serena..." I said, "It's the police. Andrew was just in a car accident."  
  
She blinked, "What?"  
  
"We need to get to the hospital right away."  
  
"Oh my..." She began, "Is he okay?"  
  
"They said it doesn't look good."  
  
She remained silent, looking so helpless. She just stood there, almost shaking.  
  
"C'mon," I said quietly.  
  
But she couldn't.   
  
I walked over to her.  
  
I wanted to comfort her, but...  
  
Should I?  
  
Could I?  
  
She put her arms around me first, head against my shirt.  
  
And at that moment, everything gave way. All my thoughts and doubts swirled into  
nothingness, and all I could feel was her.  
  
I suppose I should have felt uncomfortable, like I always had before when things  
got out of hand like this. But somehow, I didn't have time to think much at the time.  
  
"Let's go," I whispered, and she nodded.  
  
***  
  
The old doctor shook his head gravely, "I can't tell you much right now. It was a   
rather serious accident. If he can make it through the night, he'll be all right."  
  
"Where is he now?" Serena asked frantically, "What are you going to do for him?"  
  
"We're going to do everything we can," the doctor said.  
  
I nodded.  
  
"Try not to worry too much."   
  
With that, the doctor was gone.  
  
Serena leaned against the wall and began to slump down against it. Tears started to   
form.  
  
I offered her my hand, but she just stared blankly at it. So I sat down on the floor   
beside her.  
  
We just sat there for at least ten minutes. Thinking. Waiting.  
  
Beside us was the Emergency Room. The light flashed red. Andrew was still inside.  
  
I closed my eyes.  
  
It was hard to imagine Andrew, one of my only friends, lying on an operating table,  
helpless.  
  
I opened my eyes when I felt Serena's head resting on my shoulder. She was asleep.  
From all the exhaustion, probably. Poor thing.  
  
I decided to catch a bit of sleep myself.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE  
  
Where was I?  
  
I rubbed my eyes.   
  
Where's Serena?  
  
I glanced at my watch. It had only been half an hour.  
  
I stood up and stretched my legs. Then I noticed Serena sitting on one of the  
hospital benches, eyes closed, hands clasped together.  
  
"Hey," I said as gently as I could, "What are you doing?"  
  
"Praying," she said just as quietly.  
  
"Does it work?" I asked.  
  
I think I asked her as a sort of joke, but for some reason, it turned into serious   
question, as if she really knew.  
  
She nodded, "Usually, but not always. It usually works if it's unselfish."  
  
"I see..."  
  
I knelt down beside her and closed my eyes as well.  
  
A few minutes later, the emergency room doors swung open and out came a doctor.  
  
"Doctor," Serena began.  
  
"Andrew seems all right for now," the doctor said, "But he's still in critical  
condition. Of course, he will be staying in the hospital for a long time. But   
I think he'll make it."  
  
"Thank you," Serena said, and I nodded, as the old man walked off.  
  
Serena sighed in relief.  
  
"Wow," I said, letting out a deep breath myself.  
  
"Darien..." Serena said.  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"Thanks a lot."  
  
"For what?" I asked.  
  
"For... just being here."  
  
"Andrew's my friend too," I reminded her.  
  
A minute later, I turned to look at her, "Looks like our prayer worked."  
  
She smiled.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO  
  
The next day, Serena and I got to see Andrew. Of course, lots more crying from her.  
But it seemed like he was okay. Like the doctor said, Andrew would have to stay at  
the hospital for a few more weeks.  
  
That night, Serena and I came home to face the problem: us.   
  
"Darien, we need to talk."  
  
"Yeah, we do."  
  
She sat down on the couch, and I joined her.  
  
She sighed, and she put her hand over mine.  
  
"Darien, I'm going to leave for a while."  
  
I remained silent, waiting for her explanation.  
  
"But it has nothing to do with you or what you said. But... after Andrew's accident,   
I suddenly realized some things. You know, life is short, and... there's so much more   
to it than what we can see right now. I want to go out, travel, maybe do my own music   
tours... I know it's selfish of me, but I think it's what I really need right now."  
  
"I understand," I said, though I could do anything _but_ understand.  
  
I shook my head, getting rid of the selfish thoughts in my head.  
  
Then I sighed, and smiled, almost as if in defeat, "I'm really not in any place to stop   
you anyway."  
  
"I'm sorry," she said, and I shook my head.  
  
"I want to thank you."  
  
She looked at me, surprised.  
  
"Until I've met you, I've always been afraid... of people. My parents died when I was  
at a young age. And I avoided getting close to people since then, because I was afraid   
I would lose them."  
  
She stared at the ground sadly.  
  
"But... You taught me that... It doesn't matter how long you can be close to someone you  
care about. What matters is how great it is the times that you _do_ get to be together."  
  
She leaned over and put her arms around me, and we just sat there for a minute.  
  
I cared about her.   
  
A lot.  
  
And that's why I had to let her go.  
  
***  
  
Two days later, Andrew took a short leave from the hospital.   
  
His excuse was a farewell to a close family member.  
  
That night, Serena prepared to leave.  
  
A friend of hers was driving her to the airport.  
  
We had a large order-in dinner at the apartment that night, and then the inevitable goodbye.  
  
"You be careful out there," Andrew said with a grin.  
  
Serena nodded with half a smile, "You too."  
  
"I..." I began, "Send me an e-mail once in a while."  
  
"Of course," she said, "And say goodbye to Mina and Jordie for me."  
  
I nodded.  
  
She didn't move.  
  
I wanted to say more, but with Andrew there...  
  
"Well, I have to go."  
  
"Yeah," Andrew said, "Good luck. Remember us when you're famous."  
  
"I will," Serena said with a genuine smile this time, "Take care, big brother. And  
you too, Darien."  
  
"'Bye," I said softly.  
  
She opened the door, and I watched her retreating figure as she walked to the elevator.  
  
I knew I had to let her go.  
  
How could I be selfish in a situation like this?  
  
But...  
  
  
  
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE  
  
"Wait, Serena," I called.  
  
She whirled around, twin pony-tails flying.  
  
"I..."  
  
She looked at me with a soft expression.  
  
"These are for you."  
  
I took out a small black case.  
  
"Rose earrings," she said softly.  
  
I nodded.  
  
"I can't, Darien."  
  
"You must," I said firmly as I wrapped her fingers around them, "Please."  
  
"Thank you," she said quietly, accepting the box, "They're beautiful."  
  
I folded my hand over hers.  
  
"I'll never forget you." I said.  
  
"Neither will I," she said, "Please, look after Andrew."  
  
"I will."  
  
We shared a moment of silence. One last moment of togetherness.  
  
She looked up at me with big, blue eyes.  
  
Then she got up on tiptoe and leaned over to give me a peck on the cheek.  
  
"'Bye, Darien," she whispered and fled the building.  
  
And I watched her all the way.  
  
Then I sighed and turned around to see Andrew in his wheelchair.  
  
"Don't worry, Darien," he said with a faint smile, "She'll be back in a flash.   
She's never been far from home before."  
  
I didn't know what to say.  
  
***  
  
After Serena's departure from my life, I expected all the walls to come back up.  
Layer by layer.  
  
But it never happened.  
  
I had never wanted to open up to anyone before because I was afraid of being hurt.  
  
And I _was_ hurt.  
  
But I got something far better out of my relationship with Serena. The happiest   
times of my life were when she was with me.  
  
And I was prepared to -- I wanted to -- have more people in my life who cared about   
me and I could care about, like her.  
  
  
  
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR  
  
Over the three years since she left, I met and became friends with a number of people,   
from work, from the building, Andrew's friends. I even had a few relationships, though   
the longest one lasted only about a month.  
  
I once dated a girl name Raye, who was a close friend of Serena's while she was here.   
But there was very little chemistry there, and we parted on good terms. About a year   
later, I heard she was engaged to a guy named Chad.  
  
And I heard very little from Serena after a short while. She seemed busy most of the   
time, and I didn't want to intrude on her life. So I let our letters grow shorter   
and less frequent.   
  
Eventually, they stopped.  
  
The last time I had heard of her was two years ago, when I saw her picture on a poster.  
  
She had not changed at all. Meat-ball hairstyle, petite figure.  
  
Turned out she was on a concert tour in Tokyo.  
  
Back then. I debated with myself whether to go, and decided against it.  
  
If I had that decision now, I might consider otherwise.  
  
I didn't mind losing contact with her though, because I was happy with what she had given me.  
  
But... If I were to see her again.  
  
If I were to have another chance...  
  
Then it would be different.  
  
Because, I realize now that... All this time, I've always been waiting  
  
Waiting, waiting, and waiting.  
  
For the meat-ball head to come back into my life.  
  
And, I would not let her go this time. 


	5. Epilogue

Uncertainty  
by Phantasy Star  
--------------------   
Epilogue  
  
  
It was a dark winter evening. In the most famous music hall of the city, in the middle   
of town, a young violinist was performing. She moved her bow along the strings of the   
instrument gracefully. Up and down, up and down. Each of the notes she played connected   
elegantly to the next, creating a beautiful melody flow.  
  
Somewhere among the large crowd, a young man watched the artist with attentive eyes. He   
was dressed in somber attire, and his face was just as dark. He watched the musician   
thoughtfully, with a serious, almost grave expression.  
  
As the violinist ended the piece, loud applause sounded, filling the enormous room. The   
audience stood up for a standing ovation as the the musician bowed and bowed again.   
  
The concert being over for the night, the people began to file out of the room. The young   
man slipped into the crowd and hurried out.  
  
And he walked on to the snow-covered streets.  
  
"Mr. Shields?"   
  
The young man turned around, "Yes?"  
  
"Wow, it's really you," the teenage boy said, "I'm a big fan of your computer games."  
  
The gentleman gave a small smile and a faint nod, "Thank you."  
  
His face looked old, and he was very thin. He did not look at all like his actual age,  
which was barely thirty.  
  
"I still remember the first game you made, called 'Uncertainty'," the boy continued,   
"But I don't really understand why you gave it that name."  
  
The young man stared into the distance and spoke slowly, "When I programmed the game,  
I met someone who changed my life completely. But I had too many doubts back then, and  
I could never really grasp my own feelings towards her, so I let her go, thinking it  
was best.  
  
"I became a happier, freer person after I had met her. But eventually, I realized that  
it wasn't enough to have been with her, I wanted to be with her still. And I missed her  
terribly."  
  
He paused.  
  
"What happened?" asked the intrigued boy, "Did you find her?"  
  
The young man looked at him, "I did. But it's different now. So many things are   
different now. Like in the game, some things just aren't meant to be, and not everything  
works out at the end."  
  
'You said you wouldn't let her go if you had another chance.'  
  
The gentleman bid farewell to the boy and continued down the street.  
  
'I can't. I'm too afraid. Too afraid to even talk to her. I don't know what she wants.'  
  
He approached the crossroad and prepared to cross the street.  
  
'I don't know if she's changed. I don't know if she remembers.'  
  
He waited as a limosine drove by.   
  
'I don't know if it'll be the same. I don't know if she cares.'  
  
Inside was the musician from the concert.  
  
The gentleman stared at her longingly as the car sped away.  
  
The earrings she wore shimmered -- they were shaped like roses.  
  
'I can't...'  
  
He shook his head.  
  
'... Too much uncertainty.'  
  
  
  
The End  
-------  
  
  
Author's Notes:  
  
The sequel is now up, under Uncertainty II.   
Thanks for reading! 


End file.
